for me, this was a tremendous accomplishment.
pre-2005, i was a hardcore exerciser, both as a means to stay in shape and fit, but also as a method of releasing stress and tension. i enjoyed the victory over my body that a good run provided. i relished having that control over myself.
then in 2005, i injured my knee and since then, exercise has been a tricky and inconstant obstacle course for me. i was no longer able to run consistently, and my knee would begin to moan and groan at the mere thought of the gym. it pained my heart in no small way, both because i longed for those sweet endorphins to course through my veins, but also because of my struggle with food and with my appearance. i hated having that power to burn my calories taken away from me. (this is a story for another time. today is about victories).
but last week, after much encouragement from my husband, I decided to give running another try.
here's another thing about me - i find it extremely difficult to start slow. i have many times re-injured myself because i have to go just a little faster than i should, i have to go a little longer than is wise, just because i'm a stubborn perfectionist who can't stand to start at the beginning. sometimes i'd rather just not do something than risk doing it poorly or waste time doing it slowly.
but the lord somehow got through this time and gave me the grace to go slow, to ease into it again, to be humble and take care of my body.
i am now at a week-and-a-half of getting up at the break of dawn (read 6:45am) -- which is its own miraculous occasion. i think my husband is more astounded that i drag myself out of bed at that extreme hour than the fact that i then put on my sneakers and run outside for 20 minutes. i love to sleep. i might adore sleep, on the same level as ice cream. i'm not kidding - my sleep is extremely precious to me. after all, i run around after a two year old all day. i can't afford to lose any energy.
but i'm doing it. i'm sacrificing a few minutes of precious sleep so to kick myself back into shape. i feel so much better, more healthy, more awake in the morning. by mid-afternoon, i'm raring for a nap, but i'm sure that will get better.
but the point is that i started. even though it's a mere 20 minutes (if even). even if i trod along at the pace of a tortoise. even if my knee every so often moans and groans, just to remind me he's there and not happy about this. i'm doing it. i stopped saying, "i should..." and instead i got up and did.
and boy does it feel good.
what are you not doing that you wish you were? GO GET STARTED! life is too short to wait or doubt.
Awesome Gabi! I recently just started running, I am in NO way a runner, but since there are not too many ballet classes for used to be dancers, running has to fill that void. And I'm loving it!
ReplyDeleteYou're right, it's such a great stress release, especially after running around after a baby, toddler and preschooler all day!
Way to go! I've been wanting to start running again, but have been needing the motivation to get up early. Thanks for the inspiration!
ReplyDeleteSara - MONDO HUGE props to you for running with 3 kiddos. I hope that I will continue to be so inspired. I know a lot of mommies that forget to take care of themselves because they have so many others to care for, and that to me seems to be such a travesty. You cannot properly love and care for others unless you are taking good care of yourself and staying healthy.
ReplyDeleteFrancine - you can do it! I mean, it's taken me, what, until Matthew's 2nd birthday to actually get off my rear and go? So you're way ahead of me! For me, it came down to seeing myself in the reflection of a mirror and saying, "Okay, in all honesty there are areas that I could improve very easily, and without killing myself, and I would just feel better." So don't overdo it, start slow, and give yourself awesome victory treats. :D